Temperament: A Little Role Play

Kids and teens are always comparing themselves to their peers. It's a point of self-reflection and learning about other people. But self-comparison can also be a source of confusion and self-criticism.

• "How come I'm so shy around new people?"
• "Why am I scared to go off the high dive and Luke isn't?"
• "Maya doesn't even care that we moved and I'm so homesick."

Understanding that we're born with certain wiring (which shapes our personality, behavior, needs, and outlook) gives us a context for why we are the way we are. This helps us be more understanding of ourselves and others, which paves the way for self-kindness, kindness to others, and strong relationship skills.

Defining temperament is a little tricky. It's related to personality, but not the same thing.

Here's the simplest explanation I've found: